I was in a gathering sometime ago, where someone was invited to preach on relationships. He spoke so eloquently, but I a had problem with the facts, as he presented them. It is about responsibility in relationships. The question is not about who is loving right or who is not, it is about who/what is the yardstick for the love we preach. We are talking about the love between a man and a woman.
People have preached messages on Ruth and Naomi, David and Jonathan, and how the relationship that existed between them, is typical of what a relationship should be. Perhaps in the area of intimacy and loyalty, but like a certain T.V commercial once read: ‘If it is not panadol, it is not the same thing as panadol’. No matter how much we try to cite the relationship between David and Jonathan, as an example for men and women in relationships, it is not, and does not suffice. God was careful about this, and only one relationship in the whole of the scripture (to the best of my knowledge) qualifies as a yardstick for every other relationship, and that is the relationship between Christ and the Church.
People have preached messages on Ruth and Naomi, David and Jonathan, and how the relationship that existed between them, is typical of what a relationship should be. Perhaps in the area of intimacy and loyalty, but like a certain T.V commercial once read: ‘If it is not panadol, it is not the same thing as panadol’. No matter how much we try to cite the relationship between David and Jonathan, as an example for men and women in relationships, it is not, and does not suffice. God was careful about this, and only one relationship in the whole of the scripture (to the best of my knowledge) qualifies as a yardstick for every other relationship, and that is the relationship between Christ and the Church.
Honor Christ by submitting to each other. You
wives must submit to your husbands’ leadership
in the same way you submit to the Lord. For a
husband is in charge of his wife in the same way
Christ is in charge of his body the church. (He gave
his very life to take care of it and be its savior!) So
you wives must willingly obey your husbands in
everything just as the church obeys Christ.
And you husbands show the same kind of love to
your wives as Christ showed to the church when
he died for her, to make her holy and clean…That
is how husbands should treat their wives, loving
them as part of themselves. For since a man and
his wife are now one, a man is really doing himself
a favor and loving himself when he loves his wife!
Eph 5: 21-28(Living Bible)
It was at the point of this revelation that I started to appreciate why we have very serious problems in our relationship with our spouses. Men think and behave as women when they ought to behave as men, and women think and behave as men when they ought to behave as women. We either consciously or unconsciously, think as David or Jonathan, when we ought to think as the church, and we think of Ruth or Naomi, when we ought to be thinking as Christ. The relationship between Christ and the church remains the perfect yardstick.
When we are faced with certain problems in our relationships, what are the things we think about first? A man was created as a man, and with the anointing to live up to his responsibilities as a man, and so was a woman. A woman cannot learn how to be a good wife from David and Jonathan, and a man cannot learn how to be a good husband from Ruth and Naomi. The learning must be from Christ and the Church.
The truth we live by must be accurate, because it is the only thing that can make a difference in our lives. If you must go into marriage, know that the yardstick is Christ and the Church, nothing less suffices; and if you are already married, you can start to repair whatever is broken in your relationship, by taking a closer look at Christ and the Church.
*It is good for a man to understand the way a woman thinks and operates, and vice versa, but it is not proper for you to say that a man behaves like a woman, etc. That is not a compliment. We have gradually made excuses for gays and lesbians even in the house of God. It is not just as it pertains to sexual immorality, but when you as a man, are more comfortable with sharing things you ought to be sharing with a woman with a man, then you are transferring feelings to the wrong person. This goes for the women also.*
The mere fact that we do something in sincerity does not make the action right. You can be sincerely wrong. Everything in the Bible, and in life as a matter of fact, has a reason for its existence. It is meant to address a particular issue(s). It thus follows that we must seek truth from the right places and not from sources that look like they are genuine, but are really not.
Remember! No matter how beautiful a royal palm tree is, it is just what it is- a royal palm tree, not a coconut tree. You cannot desire a coconut from a royal palm; and no matter how much alike they are, they can never, and will never be the same. God carefully designed manuals for everything He ever created. Use the right manual for the right situation. Christ and the Church is the all-encompassing manual for relationships. No other manual could ever be better.
wives must submit to your husbands’ leadership
in the same way you submit to the Lord. For a
husband is in charge of his wife in the same way
Christ is in charge of his body the church. (He gave
his very life to take care of it and be its savior!) So
you wives must willingly obey your husbands in
everything just as the church obeys Christ.
And you husbands show the same kind of love to
your wives as Christ showed to the church when
he died for her, to make her holy and clean…That
is how husbands should treat their wives, loving
them as part of themselves. For since a man and
his wife are now one, a man is really doing himself
a favor and loving himself when he loves his wife!
Eph 5: 21-28(Living Bible)
It was at the point of this revelation that I started to appreciate why we have very serious problems in our relationship with our spouses. Men think and behave as women when they ought to behave as men, and women think and behave as men when they ought to behave as women. We either consciously or unconsciously, think as David or Jonathan, when we ought to think as the church, and we think of Ruth or Naomi, when we ought to be thinking as Christ. The relationship between Christ and the church remains the perfect yardstick.
When we are faced with certain problems in our relationships, what are the things we think about first? A man was created as a man, and with the anointing to live up to his responsibilities as a man, and so was a woman. A woman cannot learn how to be a good wife from David and Jonathan, and a man cannot learn how to be a good husband from Ruth and Naomi. The learning must be from Christ and the Church.
The truth we live by must be accurate, because it is the only thing that can make a difference in our lives. If you must go into marriage, know that the yardstick is Christ and the Church, nothing less suffices; and if you are already married, you can start to repair whatever is broken in your relationship, by taking a closer look at Christ and the Church.
*It is good for a man to understand the way a woman thinks and operates, and vice versa, but it is not proper for you to say that a man behaves like a woman, etc. That is not a compliment. We have gradually made excuses for gays and lesbians even in the house of God. It is not just as it pertains to sexual immorality, but when you as a man, are more comfortable with sharing things you ought to be sharing with a woman with a man, then you are transferring feelings to the wrong person. This goes for the women also.*
The mere fact that we do something in sincerity does not make the action right. You can be sincerely wrong. Everything in the Bible, and in life as a matter of fact, has a reason for its existence. It is meant to address a particular issue(s). It thus follows that we must seek truth from the right places and not from sources that look like they are genuine, but are really not.
Remember! No matter how beautiful a royal palm tree is, it is just what it is- a royal palm tree, not a coconut tree. You cannot desire a coconut from a royal palm; and no matter how much alike they are, they can never, and will never be the same. God carefully designed manuals for everything He ever created. Use the right manual for the right situation. Christ and the Church is the all-encompassing manual for relationships. No other manual could ever be better.
1 comment:
Good post.
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