LET IT GO

I read this piece, and thought to myself "it will be very unfair of me, if I do not share this most powerful message with you". I am certain that it will bless you, cause it blessed me

Let it go for 2008 -By T. D. Jakes

There are people who can walk away from you. And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you: let them walk. I don't want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone.

When people can walk away from you let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left. The bible said that, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1 John 2:19] People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can't make them stay. Let them go.

And it doesn't mean that they are a bad person. It just means that their part in the story is over. And you've got to know when people's part in your story is over so that you don't keep trying to raise the dead. You've got to know when it's dead. You've got to know when it's over. Let me tell you something. I've got the gift of good-bye. It's the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye.

It's not that I'm hateful, it's that I'm faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He'll give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat I don't need it. Stop Begging people to stay! . Let them go!! If you are holding on to something that doesn't belong to you and was never intended for your life, Then you need to...... LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains ...... LET IT GO!!! If someone can't treat you right, love you back, and see your worth..... LET IT GO!!! If someone has angered you . LET IT GO!!! If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge...... LET IT GO!!! If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction...... LET IT GO!!! If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents LET IT GO!!!

If you! U have a bad attitude....... LET IT GO!!! If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better...... LET IT GO!!! If you're stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in Him...... LET IT GO!!! If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship....... LET IT GO!!! If you keep trying to help someone who won't even try to help themselves...... LET IT GO!!! If you're feeling depressed and stressed ......... LET IT GO!!!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling yourself and God is saying 'take your hands off of it,' then you need to...... LET IT GO!!! Let the past be the past. Forget the former things. GOD is doing a new thing for 2008!!! LET IT GO!!! Get Right or Get Left .. Think about it, and then . LET IT GO!!!

God loves you and watches over you everyday.

FRIENDS

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person.
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons,
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant. But thank the people you meet for being a part of your life, whether they were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

DAVID AND JONATHAN- the lesson, the story.

I was in a gathering sometime ago, where someone was invited to preach on relationships. He spoke so eloquently, but I a had problem with the facts, as he presented them. It is about responsibility in relationships. The question is not about who is loving right or who is not, it is about who/what is the yardstick for the love we preach. We are talking about the love between a man and a woman.
People have preached messages on Ruth and Naomi, David and Jonathan, and how the relationship that existed between them, is typical of what a relationship should be. Perhaps in the area of intimacy and loyalty, but like a certain T.V commercial once read: ‘If it is not panadol, it is not the same thing as panadol’. No matter how much we try to cite the relationship between David and Jonathan, as an example for men and women in relationships, it is not, and does not suffice. God was careful about this, and only one relationship in the whole of the scripture (to the best of my knowledge) qualifies as a yardstick for every other relationship, and that is the relationship between Christ and the Church.

Honor Christ by submitting to each other. You
wives must submit to your husbands’ leadership
in the same way you submit to the Lord. For a
husband is in charge of his wife in the same way
Christ is in charge of his body the church. (He gave
his very life to take care of it and be its savior!) So
you wives must willingly obey your husbands in
everything just as the church obeys Christ.
And you husbands show the same kind of love to
your wives as Christ showed to the church when
he died for her, to make her holy and clean…That
is how husbands should treat their wives, loving
them as part of themselves. For since a man and
his wife are now one, a man is really doing himself
a favor and loving himself when he loves his wife!
Eph 5: 21-28(Living Bible)

It was at the point of this revelation that I started to appreciate why we have very serious problems in our relationship with our spouses. Men think and behave as women when they ought to behave as men, and women think and behave as men when they ought to behave as women. We either consciously or unconsciously, think as David or Jonathan, when we ought to think as the church, and we think of Ruth or Naomi, when we ought to be thinking as Christ. The relationship between Christ and the church remains the perfect yardstick.

When we are faced with certain problems in our relationships, what are the things we think about first? A man was created as a man, and with the anointing to live up to his responsibilities as a man, and so was a woman. A woman cannot learn how to be a good wife from David and Jonathan, and a man cannot learn how to be a good husband from Ruth and Naomi. The learning must be from Christ and the Church.

The truth we live by must be accurate, because it is the only thing that can make a difference in our lives. If you must go into marriage, know that the yardstick is Christ and the Church, nothing less suffices; and if you are already married, you can start to repair whatever is broken in your relationship, by taking a closer look at Christ and the Church.
*It is good for a man to understand the way a woman thinks and operates, and vice versa, but it is not proper for you to say that a man behaves like a woman, etc. That is not a compliment. We have gradually made excuses for gays and lesbians even in the house of God. It is not just as it pertains to sexual immorality, but when you as a man, are more comfortable with sharing things you ought to be sharing with a woman with a man, then you are transferring feelings to the wrong person. This goes for the women also.*

The mere fact that we do something in sincerity does not make the action right. You can be sincerely wrong. Everything in the Bible, and in life as a matter of fact, has a reason for its existence. It is meant to address a particular issue(s). It thus follows that we must seek truth from the right places and not from sources that look like they are genuine, but are really not.

Remember! No matter how beautiful a royal palm tree is, it is just what it is- a royal palm tree, not a coconut tree. You cannot desire a coconut from a royal palm; and no matter how much alike they are, they can never, and will never be the same. God carefully designed manuals for everything He ever created. Use the right manual for the right situation. Christ and the Church is the all-encompassing manual for relationships. No other manual could ever be better.

A STORY TO ASSURE YOU

I showered and shaved. I adjusted my tie. I got there and sat in a pew just in time. Bowing my head in prayer as I closed my eyes. I saw the shoe of the man next to me touching my own. I sighed. With plenty of room on either side, I thought, "Why must our soles touch?" It bothered me, his shoe touching mine. But it didn't bother him much. A prayer began: "Our Father". I thought, "This man with the shoes has no pride. They're dusty, worn, and scratched. Even worse, there are holes on the side!" "Thank You for blessings," the prayer went on. The shoe man said a quiet "Amen."
I tried to focus on the prayer. But my thoughts were on his shoes again. Aren't we supposed to look our best. When walking through that door? "Well, this certainly isn't it," I thought, Glancing toward the floor. Then the prayer was ended. And the songs of praise began. The shoe man was certainly loud. Sounding proud as he sang. His voice lifted the rafters. His hands were raised high. The Lord could surely hear. The shoe man's voice from the sky. It was time for the offering. And what I threw in was steep. I watched as the shoe man reached. Into his pockets so deep. I saw what was pulled out. What the shoe man put in. Then I heard a soft "clink" as when silver hits tin. The sermon really bored me. To tears, and that's no lie. It was the same for the shoe man. For tears fell from his eyes. At the end of the service as is the custom here, We must greet new visitors. And show them all good cheer. But I felt moved somehow and wanted to meet the shoe man. So after the closing prayer. I reached over and shook his hand. He was old and his skin was dark. And his hair was truly a mess. But I thanked him for coming… For being our guest. He said, "My names' Charlie. I'm glad to meet you, my friend." There were tears in his eyes. But he had a large, wide grin. "Let me explain," he said. Wiping tears from his eyes. "I've been coming here for months. And you're the first to say 'Hi. I know that my appearance is not like all the rest. But I really do try to always look my best. I always clean and polish my shoes, before my very long walk. But by the time I get here they're dirty and dusty, like chalk”.My heart filled with pain and I swallowed to hide my tears. As he continued to apologize for daring to sit so near, he said, "When I get here I know I must look a sight. But I thought if I could touch you, then maybe our souls might unite”. I was silent for a moment knowing whatever was said Would pale in comparison. I spoke from my heart, not my head. "Oh, you've touched me," I said "And taught me, in part; "That the best of any man is what is found in his heart." The rest, I thought, this shoe man will never know. Like just how thankful I really am that his dirty old shoe touched my soul Remember, everyone needs a friend. Someday you might feel like you have no friends at all. Just remember this site and take comfort in knowing that someone out there cares about you..... and always will.

FRIENDSHIP IS A MIRACLE FROM GOD

In our lives, we never know how many miracles we will need. A miracle is not the suspension of natural law, but the operation of a higher law. I know you'll keep the ball moving! Here it goes. Throw it back to someone who means something to you! A ball is a circle, no beginning, no end. It keeps us together like our Circle of Friends.

MY OATH TO YOU.

When you are sad...I will dry your tears. When you are scared...I will comfort your fears. When you are worried...I will give you hope. When you are confused...I will help you cope. And when you are lost...And can't see the light, I shall be your beacon...Shining ever so bright. This is my oath...I pledge till the end. Why you may ask...Because you're my friend.

Signed: GOD

FROM SOMEONE WHO KNOWS

I would like for us in this edition, to talk about something that requires a lot of attention these days. You call it an evolution, or a lifestyle, but it is represented as the phrase- LIVE-IN LOVERS.

Live-in lovers are people in a relationship who are living together (under the same roof), but are not married. 70-80% among single folks of working class status fit into this situation. All kinds of people (Christians and non-Christians) fit into this web, for all kinds of reasons:

Some believe that this is the easiest way to consolidate their relationship, since a lot people these days (it is claimed) would not want to be married to a “total stranger”. Others get into this web, while trying to put up a fight against the disapproval of their parents and loved ones of their relationships. To others being live-in lovers is cheaper than living apart (considering the standard of living today) especially since they will ultimately be married to each other, yet for some others, it is the fashionable thing to do, since it pronounces commitment to the relationship in more ways than one. For some other people (that I know), they were driven into living together by hostile and unanticipated circumstances around them, and some get into it, just to preserve little secrets about certain embarrassing weaknesses (as in; not washing their dirty linen in public), which might be exposed if they live with other friends of same sex. Whichever reason it is, the following lines, is dedicated to every one who is presently caught in the live-in lovers’ web.

Come unto me all ye that labour and are

heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take

my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am

meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest

for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden

light. Mattew11: 28-30 KJV

Before I continue, let me say that there are two kinds of live-in lovers, those who are live-in lovers by choice, and those who are pushed into it by the circumstances around them.

Believe me, the problem with being live-in lovers is not particularly sex! (Oops, did I just shock somebody?). You do not have to be live-in lovers to be in a sexual relationship. As a matter of fact, you could be having a sexual relationship with your spouse right under her father’s roof, even if the poor man is a reverend gentleman (you already know that don’t you?), and from my little research a lot of the so-called live-in lovers are not having sex. Do not get me wrong, live-in lovers could be, and are actually more susceptible to getting sexually involved with each other than those that are living apart, because the situation in itself could make resistance to ‘red alert’ and ‘sparking wires’ very, very negligible. Yet it is all a function of the mind-set, because couples that are not living together might also get this kick whenever they are alone, even if they see each other once every month. This is usually a lust problem, and not a curse that follows live-in lovers.

Also, a lot of people believe that being live-in lovers is the easiest way to get entangled for life (a lot of people I know would have loved to be…but for this reason). The truth really, is that it is easier for so-called live-in lovers to break up than it is for those living apart. While investments and commitments are made, it is easy to notice those very ugly sides/flaws of the other person; a guy that snores like a pig, whose feet smell once his shoe socks are off, who picks his nose in the crudest of ways and is so disorderly, even to his boxer shorts; or a lady who does not remember she soaked her undies in a small bucket in the bathroom until after ten days. How about when the guy has no respect for your privacy and just talks too much especially about your personal life, or a lady who cannot just stop picking a fight with you, or a neighbour at least once a week. Have you ever considered a spouse who is double dating though you are living together, and is a pathological liar? There are so many reasons why you should feel that the investment or commitment you have made in a live-in lover situation is not commensurate with what you are getting, which will consequently make you throw in the towel for good. In a live-in lover situation, very little secrets are kept. Benin people call it “see finish”, and when you ‘see finish’, what else is there to hold unto?

If you ask me, the biggest problem with an unmarried couple staying together, which is the number one killer of beautiful relationships, is the ROLE: When God created us, He put in us the anointing (ability) to dispense with any responsibility inherent in how we are created and the purpose of our creation. This is why the will of God never takes you to a place where His grace cannot sustain you. For those who understand this, you will agree that God never gives a responsibility, without releasing the requisite anointing (or ability) with which to dispense with that responsibility. A relationship is a responsibility, and God who is the creator of relationships always releases the accompanying anointing with which we handle our relationships.

I can do all things through Christ, which strengthens me

Philippians 4:13 KJV

N/B: Christ/Messiah means the anointed one and His anointing.

This is why relationship is not a burden, and if your relationship is a burden, then you might need to really check yourself and consider a lot of things. Responsibility/relationship are in levels, and at every level, God releases power (anointing, ability) which makes the challenges at that level bearable and surmountable. But consider a situation where the ability God has released to you is for the challenges in ‘level 1’, but you are playing the ROLE in ‘level 2’.

Precept must be upon precept…

God is a God of order and He is not chaotic. So whenever a responsibility becomes or is becoming a burden, it could be that something is not in its proper place- a disorder somewhere along the line (this might not always be the case, but it does happen).

Aligning the aforementioned to the subject, I must say that live-in lovers are faced with this problem every other day-No matter how close you are, you are not husband and wife yet; and to this extent, you do not have what it takes (the anointing) to dispense with the responsibility of a husband or a wife. It is easy to play husband/wife when you are in a live-in lover situation. Privileges easily turn into rights; opinions/suggestions easily turn into instructions. Also, when you ascribe the rights and privileges of a husband/wife to yourself, you invite the responsibilities in that capacity upon yourself; and rest assured, you will hit a brick wall.

My candid advice: it will be more honourable if so called live-in lovers would live apart. Do all you can to get accommodation elsewhere for one of you. Seek counsel, because you need all the help you can get. You need a guide. Be bold enough to present the matter to your pastor or someone in your church (preferably a good friend) who your spirit bears witness will understand you and help you with good godly counsel. Do not be afraid or ashamed to seek help in your challenges, so that your mistakes will not mock your miracle.

There hath no temptation taken you but such

as is common to man: but God is faithful,

who will not suffer you to be tempted above

that ye are able; but will with the same temptation

also make a way of escape, that you may be able

to bear. I Corinthians 10:13 KJV

Above all, pray and seek God’s face, because the destiny of a whole nation might be depending on your actions.

Remember! You need the right skill and equipment to climb a coconut tree, or else you will crash land. If you are live-in lovers by choice, it is time to reconsider your position; if you are live-in lovers by some twist, well…it is time to get down on your knees, and God will make a way for you.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?

Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution,

or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword?

…Nay, in all these things we are more than

conquerors through him that loved us.

Romans 8: 35-37

FEARFULLY AND WONDERFULLY…

Too tall, too short, too dark, too light, too skinny, too fat. Too this, too that:

One of the greatest problems relationships have these days bothers on complex. Complex about how we are and how we are not; what we are and what we are not; what we have and what we have not. We hate people laughing around us because we feel they are laughing at the way we are; we are afraid to mingle or participate in certain kinds of activities, because we are too timid to be ourselves. A lot of us carry this behavior into our relationship(s), such that we are unnecessarily cautious and touchy with people we love:
He didn’t talk to me like that because of what I did wrong,
he just can’t stand my size (or my looks)…everybody hates
me. Am just not good enough…
If you feel this way, don’t bother about going into a relationship yet. Let us deal with that complex before it destroys both you and every other thing you love, cherish and encounter.
Most of the times we feel that people treat us the way they do, because of the way we are, or because of the things we are not, so we build a defense for ourselves, which culminates into aggression that most times are misplaced. Once the greatest appraisal of yourself is based on people's opinion of you, you will always take the backdoor even when you are not asked to; and even when there is no back door, you will create one, big enough to contain you.
Now you want to be like somebody else, because you feel/believe that it will make you more acceptable to people.
It is not about whom people think you are
It is not even about who you think you are
It is about what God can make you-Ogo’s nuggets
So how about paying more attention to what God thinks of you?

If God would let us take a small peep into the future, we will be shocked to discover how perfectly the way we are, fits into His plan for our lives. So anytime you try to do something to change the way you are just because you are ashamed of it, you are actually saying that God is not as wise as He says He is. You will always get into trouble when you try to be somebody else, and anyone that tries to reduplicate himself/herself or anyone else in you, does not attach value to who/what God has made you.

You have a complex problem when you
cannot celebrate yourself; when you feel
that everyone is better than you are. Soon,
if you don’t already, you will hate yourself,
then you will begin to blame God-Ogo’s nuggets

Instead of trying to change how God has created us, perhaps we should work and pray to change, by the constantly renewing of our minds, certain characters and traits that we have, which are unacceptable to God, and are potential destroyers of our relationships.
…and be not conformed to this world:
but be ye transformed by the renewing
of your mind, that ye may prove what is
that good, and acceptable, and perfect will
of God. Rom 12:2 (KJV)
Let us build ourselves to the level where we become trustworthy and reliable, then you will be in yourself a MIRACLE; and believe it or not, a miracle no matter the imperfections it may seem to have, is still a miracle, and someone will love you enough to sincerely thank God for his/her miracle, despite those things you see as flaws-Ogo’s nuggets
Anyone that cannot stand the way you are neither understands nor appreciates the wisdom of God in your life; and if you continue to hang out with them, they will eventually kill the very essence of God in you.
He that walketh with the wise men shall be wise:
But the companion of fools shall be destroyed.
Prov.13: 20(KJV)
Stop associating with people who are ashamed of the way you are, what you are, how you are, or what you do (as long as it is godly), because you will continue to feel inadequate, as though you have to be like them to be acceptable or respectable.
Anyone who doesn’t attach value to who you are
or how you are, does not deserve your companionship
because he will definitely derail you from the plan and
purpose of God for your life-Ogo’s nuggets

More so, all you ever need in this world to be successful, is God’s approval. Once you have that, nothing else matters. Never wish you were somebody else. Do not exchange the Michael Jackson that God has made you for an equally imperfect Elizabeth Taylor. Stay dark if you were born dark. Do not starve yourself to death because you want to be as skinny as Celine. Stay away from those drugs you are taking in order to alter certain things about yourself. Feel good about yourself. God is all knowing! Do well not to challenge Him.

Be bold, be strong for the Lord your God is with you, raring the GIANT in you. Let that giant grow for God has not given you a spirit of fear, but of power, love and sound mind.
Oh what a wonderful God we have!
How great are his wisdom and knowledge
and riches! How impossible it is for us to
understand his decisions and his methods!
For who among us can know the mind of
the Lord? Who knows enough to be his
counselor and guide? And who could ever
offer to the Lord enough to induce him to
act? For everything comes from God alone.
Everything lives by his power, and everything
is for his glory. To him be glory evermore.
Rom 11:33-36(Living Bible)
He that will climb to bring down the coconut must first count himself deserving. CELEBRATE YOURSELF! You are all you have got.